Rudolph Song Lyrics

Welcome children, it is time for a reading of the Christmas classic; Rudolph the Reindeer.
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, had a very shiny nose.
His mom told him that he had rosacea, so he went to the doctor.
After being prescribed an ointment that gave him an allergic reaction, subsequently suing the doctor for malpractice and settling out of court, he concluded that his nose was, instead, a miracle.
His classmates, however, were jealous of his shiny nose, and as is the want of immature adolescents, they tortured him with a tuning fork.
One night, after a particularly nasty torturing, Rudolph walked off into the cold snowy forest, feeling ashamed and lonely.
He cried at the moon, angry at his pathetic lot, and his nose shone particularly bright.
Suddenly he heard a cry above him.
A shadow passed overhead and Rudolf cowered down, shaking all over and covering his eyes.
When at last he opened them, he saw before him a red sleigh, and a giant, grey-bearded Orc smiling at him.
Zug-zug-zug!" said the grey-bearded orc, "
What an amazing nose you have!"
Rudolph's eyes shone bright. "
It's Great Father Winter!" he exclaimed, and he trotted over to the sleigh.
It sure is," said Great Father Winter, "and I saw your nose from miles away.